With Week 1 behind us, you now have a solid foundation for the rest of the course. Your blog will be a primary visitation spot - a place for you to post your new reflective writing. Your blogs are also the primary place for the community of the class. You are encouraged to visit classmates' blogs frequently, and to informally contact students who's writing you enjoy. You can do this by either leaving comments on their blog posts or by sending them emails via Blackboard.
With drop/add being completed, we also have our final course roster. Certain late added students may not yet have blogs up. Also, certain enrolled students may be in the process of withdrawing. This means, it'll take another week or so to become certain of who will be participating actively in your peer groups, which are now listed in the margin of the class blog site. If a late added student doesn't yet have a blog up, I've added them to peer groups tentatively, with an asterisk (*) next to their name. You won't see a link to their blogs in this case, and shouldn't worry to review them unless the asterisk comes down.
Being in a peer group gives you an opportunity to read and be read. At the beginning of each week, you'll get to read the writing others in your group have created as a response to prompts. As you read, you'll keep your own blog open and set to "New Post". For each group member, you will offer one long paragraph (5-6 sentences) of feedback or more. Generalized messages such as "I liked this" are welcome but will not be counted towards the 5-6 sentences of required constructive feedback. Use page 6 of your syllabus and chapter 7 of your textbook to offer academic level constructive critique.
Below is an example of what a successful peer review post would look like:
(Blog Title) Week 5 Peer Review
Patrick: I enjoyed your blog posts from last week. I can tell you're working hard to improve your story structure, and last week, it really showed. All three of your posts had a really strong introduction and conclusion. Your post titled, "College Horror Story", was my favorite because you included specific details about characters and made them really vivid. I almost thought I was watching a group of my own friends go through the events because you made them relatable. In "Too Much Caffeine", you spent a lot of time developing character but I don't think you needed to do that. That post seemed to be more about who you are and what you're doing, and the interesting writing had more to do with what you were thinking at the time, not what was around you. On page 101 of the textbook, there's a section called "An Overabundance of People", and it does a good job of describing the basic problem I had with that post. I also appreciated "Big Bang" because you talked about things you'd learned in your science class in a really personal way. It worked great as a metaphor for all the changes you've been experiencing in college.
Dierdre: Thanks for the great critique last week! It helped me make some positive changes in my writing for this week. I always laugh when I read your blog posts. In "Open Air", you wrote dialogue really well, and what your soccer coach was saying was hilarious! I think your dialogue worked best for me because you also had really good description of setting and characters. It was almost like watching a movie. That being said, the overall story lacked focus. I felt like I was reading a small piece of a larger story, where the writer didn't give me an introduction or conclusion. I could see it being a really funny section in a longer essay. There were no posts for Thursday so I've only critiqued your post from Tuesday.
Kris: I liked your posts last week. They brought back a lot of memories of my own childhood experiences! I thought "Kindergarten Blues" was really fun to read because the voice you used and the details you wrote brought me right into the mind and world of a child. That being said, I think using present tense and the voice of a child made certain things confusing. For instance, in the section where you described an unknown man approaching, I didn't know if I was supposed to be concerned and scared for the child (since it was a stranger, and as adults, we know that could be trouble), or excited (since you were describing things in a fun, laid back way). With clarification, it would be an even more amazing story. I also liked "Downtown" and "After the Rain", which used the similar setting of your childhood home in Chicago. I could imagine your writing a really long personal essay where you transition between multiple memories, including the ones in "Downtown" and "After the Rain", in a similar way to Elizabeth Gilbert in "Eat, Pray, Love". "Downtown" was a little long, though, and it lost my interest during the lengthy description of buildings. Maybe you can cut that description down to just two or three examples and use more exciting language to describe. "After the Rain" didn't seem to fit the writing prompt very well because you were supposed to write about a time in your life when you were afraid and instead you talked about a happy experience.
I hope this example clarifies what your work will be as you offer peer review through the semester.
Your other assignments this week follow similar criteria to work from last week: you have more Writing Prompts, more reading, and another Writer's Journal assignment. Completing your assignments for this week will give you a relatively accurate sense of how a typical work week for the course will go for the rest of the semester. I hope it's an enjoyable effort for you.
Each week, you'll check back to the class blog site, where you'll receive any notes of clarification or explanation from me, as needed (though, from here on out, you'll rarely need those), and where you'll receive some feedback on the previous week's assignments. Each week, I'll put a spotlight on several pieces of writing from the week before. I call this response "Greatest Hits", in which your own personal best is recognized in such a way that the entire class can learn and appreciate your writing. By midway through the semester, all of your work will have been mentioned at least once.
Below are some "Greatest Hits" from last week, and thanks to everyone for sharing some incredible work.
Greatest Hits
Kimberly's post, "Observing the Countryside"
Kimberly gives gorgeous description of a mundane place: her home office. Because of precisely chosen details, it doesn't take Kimberly long to move us from the office space she shares with her husband, to the neighborhood outside, or from morning to evening. She even moves us between entire seasons in such a short span of writing, and she does so successfully. In the evening, working parents round up and herd their children back into their homes "like so many bawling calves"; this line, like many others, brings us from a place of observation to a place of feeling. She foreshadows a time where things will be "far too quiet". In this way, a powerful emotional resolution is built into a short description of place: a reader feels loss that a certain type of beauty, as recognized by Kimberly, might one day be absent. This is a beautiful example of descriptive writing. The prose is as elegant as it is clear.
Brandon's post, "He is Ten Years Old"
In this post, Brandon uses description of character as a way to reflect on the relationship he shares with his dog, Apollo. Brandon's dog, we quickly learn, has been diagnosed with cancer and has just months to live. Topics such as this one are difficult to write well. This is because a writer is often unable to detach emotionally in order to write a story that's accessible to readers. In this piece, however, Brandon manages to write a successful story, primarily by focusing on character description and physical description of his Apollo. Rather than being overly sentimental or romanticizing his dog, he trusts a reader to love a creature that nearly edges the author out of bed and snuggles with him, before a "prompt fart and swift exit through the door". Lines such as "he is and always will be my boy" are more sentimental, but are earned when followed by lines such as "this love for him is not without complications" and the above mentioned descriptions of farting and whatnot. Writers: keep in mind that sentimentality such as this must be earned and ought not be used as a primary strategy of reflective writing. Thanks, Brandon, for earning it through your use of great, specific details.
(a picture of another Apollo, in honor of Brandon's pup)
Jamie's post, "Hangout Paradise"
In this description of place, Jamie uses an interesting style. Her writing is a great reminder that not all successful writing is verbose at it's best, and that brevity can create it's own pleasurable world. Jamie begins, "Everyone's in line, everyone's eager." This opening line does the work of ten lines of description, not just because of it's generalized comment, but because of it's lyric quality. Short lines often create a cadence like music. The confidence of her tone suggests we ought to trust this writer, even when she does choose to generalize or assume. Her short, precise sentences - some of which are even fragments - work beautifully to construct the consciousness of a person who is realistic, to the point, observant, and smart. It tells us as much about the writer as the situation. It also works beautifully to construct a scene and situation quickly. Part of the work of a writer is to keep a reader's interest; Jamie has discovered a personal style in which that's possible.
Good work Brandon, Jamie, and Kimberly! And good work to the rest of you, as well... next week, we'll spend some time looking at other authors' wonderful writing.
Enjoy the week!
-AP
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